Self-sabotage is a frustrating cycle of behavior that can prevent us from achieving our goals. It is often rooted in a lack of self-esteem and can manifest in many ways, such as procrastination, self-medication, comfort eating, and forms of self-harm. Perfectionism and imposter syndrome are also forms of self-sabotage. To break the cycle, it is important to understand the origins of this behavior and develop a psychologically sophisticated understanding of our own thinking.
Self-sabotage can take many forms, but it is often rooted in a lack of faith in oneself. Not taking proper care of yourself is a form of self-sabotage that can prevent you from thriving. This includes poor eating habits, lack of sleep, not exercising, or avoiding visits to the doctor or therapist for physical and mental health problems. It may also involve engaging in risky behaviors such as self-medication with alcohol or drugs, eating comfortably, gambling, or having risky sex.
The most common self-sabotage behaviors include procrastination, self-medication with drugs or alcohol, comfort eating, and forms of self-harm, such as cutting. Self-sabotage is rooted in counterproductive mentalities that include negativity, disorganization, indecision, and negative self-talk. Perfectionism and imposter syndrome are also forms of self-sabotage. An insidious and ubiquitous form of self-sabotage is meaningless distractions that prohibit the achievement of the goal. When we are aware that we are self-sabotaging, the critic's voice starts to hit us and shame takes hold of us and our thinking is distorted.
To moderate our thinking biases, we need to develop a psychologically sophisticated understanding of our own thinking. This is possible with a little effort and reflection. Maybe we tend to worry about people being mad at us when this isn't normally the case. Maybe we tend to impose our perfectionist standards on others and that hurts our relationships.
Or we tend to be too hesitant in decision making. When we thoroughly understand our personal thinking mistakes, we will be able to correct them. Joseph suggests that self-sabotage occurs when we do certain things that were adaptive in a context but are no longer necessary. To break the cycle of self-sabotage, it is important to understand its origins and develop a psychologically sophisticated understanding of our own thinking. With practice, it will be easier to recognize and correct our personal thinking mistakes.
